27 thoughts on “Migrant Tales – Withered Sunsets’”

1. [Troll, don’t use a VPN. Banned. Admin]

2. The good people in N.Z tend to become very insular and guarded in their social life and interactions.Iv e also learned the technique of keeping the face as blank as possible and expressing absolutely no emotion when in a public area,when shopping just saying no more than required to get the job done ,underdressing wherever possible including wearing gumboots and a high viz shirt sometimes( store workers love this as it makes them feel superior to you), in general N.Z people do not handle confrontation even if done in a positive way,their preference is to whine loudly to somebody nearby and have the target of their whining overhear them.

   • When my cousin came from overseas to visit me, she asked me why Kiwi women look butch, dyke lack style/femininity etc… I didn’t know what to tell her because I never noticed this so I just told her it’s because of the suffragist movement and feminism. Then I remembered when we had mufti day when I was a kid, and how badly I was shamed for wearing colourful tea dresses in primary school. I like the fact we can get away with wearing little or no make up here, underdressing in tshirts, shorts and flip flops is comfy, but it makes you wonder how outsiders see us. There’s no way anywhere back home anyone would respect anybody who underdresses… But it’s better to blend in I suppose. I’ll try to keep a neutral face when going out. Anything to draw as much attention away from myself as possible.

     • Haha so funny my wife (from another country ) commented that N,Z transsexuals were very lucky as they look the same as the genetic women.

       • LOL, I’ve seen plenty of glamourous and extremely well-groomed transwomen who can easily pass as biologically female far more than most Kiwi women. It’s gonna take me years to undo the defeminisation NZ society has done to me

3. Job opening alert ,great renumeration package ,must be able to stand in same spot holding sign for up to 14 hours and some heavy lifting required up to 90kg ,would prefer a person with masters degree in health and safety ,would prefer an applicant between 18 and 25 with at least 10 years experience driving dual axle trucks with all classes of licence ,must have a team player attitude and an excellent sense of humour,possibility to earn up to $16 per hour within your first 5 years of employement and advance to position such as sign turning management officer or senior road cone cleaner,career positions like this are scarce as hens teeth so send us your resume now (would prefer at least 5 pages and photo attached) ,please send resume to s##k employement agency

   • “must have a team player attitude and an excellent sense of humour”
     -good luck finding someone like that in NZ.

     • Kiwis don’t understand team work, they’re too busy beating each other down. Everybody likes humour, but if I was an employer, I would hire anybody who had a track record of competency and a good intellectual capacity. I’ll beat them at their own game… Only hire Poms, Asians or any other migrant group with real competency.

4. “…the Kiwi way of life is a contagious cancer that kills every last brain-cell and eventually you are stripped of any real sense of identity, industrious nature, a passion of providing meaningful service to the community as well as being an overall person with any sort of substance. I feel like my senses of passion, dreaming big and my overall spirits have been eternally crushed to the extent I have become so apathetic and deeply demotivated to do anything in life”

   I SO agree with this part.
   I have worked so bloody hard all my life here in NZ, yet people continue to treat me as if I’m a second class citizen simply because I’m an Asian.
   I have a high level of education, have a successful career and paid back my student loans in less than 2 years (makes me laugh when Kiwis bitch and moan about student loans… try a thing called ‘saving’ you crybabies!!). I’m now saving up for a wedding and a deposit for a house (eventually) and I don’t complain about other rich people taking all the houses because I don’t have a sense of entitlement that all these Kiwis seem to be born with. Good on them for being rich! I’ll get a house when I can afford one. Until then, I’ll just keep on saving and I’m not about to start attacking and blaming other people just because I don’t get what I want WHEN I want it.
   I’m so sick and tired of answering questions on my origin and when I moved to NZ etc. I seem to have lost all motivation to live my life. I have no will power to try harder and contribute towards this country that doesn’t deserve it.

   • I hate the cry-baby sense of entitlement too. Why can’t Kiwis learn to be happy for others if they succeed in life and leave them to enjoy the fruits of their labour in peace? Many of us migrants, whether we are Asian, Middle Eastern, African, American or European have seen our parents work hard and they raised us with a strong sense of self-discipline and an excellent work ethic. Being successful is continually praised and we are taught that a good work ethic, passion and a strong drive are the key ingredients we need to succeed in life. Moreover, we are taught money management skills such as:

     – Only shop during sales
     – Buy food in season
     – Save at least 1/4 of our paycheck (if possible)
     – Limit going out to eat occasionally
     – Eat home cooked food
     – Buy household items in bulk when they are on special
     – Purchase quality household items that are more expensive for prolonged use
     – Try and do as much as we can at home and be as self-sufficient as possible in order to survive
     – Use a gas heater in winter, hot water bottles to keep warm, drink soups/tea etc instead of using a lot of electricity to make your house feel like a tropical climate so you only walk around in shorts

     Yet most Kiwis do not know the first thing about money management. Most Kiwis do not cook and buy unhealthy takeaways regularly, they get into debt via credit cards, loan sharks etc instead of saving money and paying cash for items they want to buy, they spend a lot of money on extravagant things like gambling/lottery tickets, overpriced alcohol/tobacco (drink at home instead of pubs/clubs) etc. Kiwis stare at your food when you bring a home-cooked meal to work for lunch and they almost try to make you feel guilty for eating well.

     In this materialistic world covered in money-sucking landmines, Kiwis spend a lot of money on things they DO NOT NEED. They spend more energy trying to tear people down who are doing better than them instead of trying to get out of debt, save money, excel in their career/business and focus on themselves/families. Not to mention, most migrants from traditional families are taught the importance of stable family relationships, yet the infidelity and instability in their relationships and strong dependence on the nanny state is strongly correlated to their dysfunctional lifestyles which they ironically refuse to accept responsibility for and they neglect their children, elderly parents, other family members etc and hence spend their lives blaming migrants and abusing them instead.

     I think most Kiwis should be given the option of free sterilisation (i.e. via vasectomies or tubal ligation) early age on. Most are unfit to be parents and the children they breed either end up like them, in prison or in the military. Unfortunately, the government wants dysfunction in the society so politicians and the state can benefit/profit from the deep dysfunction that is almost near impossible to fix (years of this on-going damage will take at least two generations to undo before the society can be stable again).

5. There should be a post traumatic stress disorder label, especially to describe the NZ immigrant condition.

   NZCPTSD – new zealand complex post traumatic stress disorder, its a very real condition. I have it.

   • Agreed. You can never seem to win with these people, they are so brainwashed they will easily blame any sane person to justify their irrational behaviour.

6. Wow. It is bad enough coming here as a grown adult, with the choice to return home (which I am currently working on), but it is another when your family has moved here, and now this is “home”. I am so sorry to hear about your awful awful experiences here.

   After 20 years of dealing with Kiwis- initially thinking that Kiwis were amazing people, so effing civilised, and subsequently have realised more and more that Kiwis are the polar opposite of civilised- I now think that NZ is the place to come to if you want to lose your mind (and finances, and sense of logic, and everything else) !

   I just had breakfast with a Kiwi friend this morning, she is someone with whom I can occasionally make observations about Kiwis to (very rare, I know!), just this morning I revealed to her that I truly thought that many if not most relationships here are of a “frenemy” nature- you know friendly on the surface but full of jealousy, resentment, feelings of superiority/inferiority, constantly measuring themselves up against you and are secretly happy when something bad happens to you, etc, underneath. To her credit she accepted what I said, but then said “but isn’t that normal?”, with the meaning that you just have to accept it and move on. Well, I told her, it is common, but not normal! Where I come from, you are allowed to call this behaviour out and say that it is not acceptable! For some reason, you are not allowed to do this in NZ, and unfortunately bad behaviour persists and perpetuates, with unfortunately real life consequences! It is bullshit, is what it is!

   • Hi Abby,

     Thank you for your supportive words. NZ society has a strong sense of psychopathy deeply ingrained into their psyche. I have seen first hand at work how one group of our co-workers would go outside have a smoke and basically bad-mouth the rest of our co-workers behind their backs on a day-to-day basis yet be so superficially friendly to their faces. It takes me back to when I was a kid and teachers would get these students to befriend me, they would find out stuff about me and sell me out to the teachers — when I was physically beaten up by other students and other people who were my “friends” saw this and I asked them to be witnesses to the Deputy Principal, they would deny the incident even happened altogether to make me look like a liar. I had one friend who saw a girl whack my face with a helmet and she admitted she saw this to the Deputy Principal — she was immediately viewed with suspicion but then the DP had to punish the bully. From my experience, NZ men can be crooks, but they are not as cunning, manipulative and psychotic as NZ women. The male teachers and co-workers were usually fairer and didn’t have a hidden agenda to crush my spirit and misrepresent me.

     One of the reasons why I lost my job was because I decided to visit one of my co-workers who had cancer (and had a 50% chance of surviving), it disgusted me how our supervisor, manager and senior administrative lady NEVER visited her and sent an incompetent woman who was their friend (and my co-worker’s frenemy) to send paperwork to my dying co-worker basically pushing her back into work as soon as possible. She was the most competent, honest and helpful worker in our team and we would not have met deadlines if it was not for her guiding us from behind the scenes and telling us the truth about our performance that our supervisor was afraid to say. I visited her a few times, and she was so shocked to see me, she told me I was the only one whose visit to her was sincere, the others were all going for gossip, even one lady who doesn’t drive and was getting rides from this woman for years didn’t come to see her. One of our newer team members who had just started working with us asked me right after our supervisor announced our colleague was diagnosed with cancer “who would take her job if she died?” Can you believe it? This lady was the BEST worker on our team, she wasn’t even 50 years old, she has three children and a husband of 30+ years and this lady was asking me about who would take her job.

     It breaks my heart that NZ society can be so predatory and parasitic in nature — they make you lose faith in humanity altogether. I was brought up to visit people I knew if they were ill or had lost somebody to see them and express condolences whether that person could do something for me or not. When people are very sick or have been ridden with a misfortune, people in NZ ONLY visit them for gossip or and most do not show up at all, yet they can easily have a smoke/drink with them for hours and laugh away at a team lunch or a Christmas party. It never ceases to amaze me how people here view kindness with suspicion as well. My father had two co-workers in SE Asia who both died of cancer, he visited both of them sincerely because this is how our parents raised us, and they both appreciated him coming and their relationships were strengthened. I knew very well if I didn’t visit my co-worker, I would feel guilty about it.

     I had another co-worker who as soon as any new people joined our team she would ask them for their FB account to try and find out everything she can about their personal life (marital status, no of kids, their economic status), then she would get all friendly with them to try and extract as much info as possible to maliciously spread it with others in our team. She was the first one I blocked from my phone when I was stood down from work for 2 weeks before I was dismissed. I don’t have FB and keep a very low profile yet my co-workers kept trying to use other people to contact me via landline or email to see if I had started working again or how I was coping with what happened.

     I wish you all the best with your journey back home. Hopefully, everybody else still stuck here will finally get out of this shithole in one piece.

     Best of luck!

     • ‘yet my co-workers kept trying to use other people to contact me via landline or email to see if I had started working again or how I was coping’

       That would be those morons @ mental health filling out their time sheets by monitoring you. Save the taxpayer wasted money, and limit any further aggravation of your NZ immigrant trauma by avoiding those muppets.

       Anything you say or do will be misconstrued by the gossiping pin heads they are. Its a no win situation, withdraw all contact, say you’ll ring back when your not busy or dont answer the phone or emails.

       Once you stop playing their game they will lose interest [or plant bugs in your home]!

       • It was actually a handful of my co-workers using other people at work who I had a decent relationship with to do their dirty work. For example, right after I was on leave as per request by my supervisor, my “friend” who got me fired because I stood up for myself and refused to do something I wasn’t assigned to do rung me up. I didn’t know why exactly I was put on leave, but then this “friend” admitted it to me which was stupid of her. I was emailing back and forth with a male co-worker I had gotten close to, we hung out often because he was the only other co-worker I had who was somewhat intellectual and passionate about politics and foreign policy like me, but then he exposed himself by continuously emailing me trying to see how I was and I found out he was gossiping about me to my other co-workers. I basically politely had to tell him to “f*ck off, and leave me alone” and then he finally got it. It was disappointing, I thought he was the decent one out of the lot of them. Then about two months later, my “friend” who got me fired rung me up to “see how I was doing” and then I said those words “you stabbed me in the back” and then she said, “come on, ________ you’ve hurt me too, it goes both ways, that two weeks when you didn’t talk to me” and then she said “its time to say goodbye” and hung up on me. Luckily she never called ever again. I was disappointed big time, I expected more from this “friend”, I had visited her twice in hospital when she had surgery, I never forgot her birthday and always had a gift for her, shared food with her, she was a friendly, church-going lady who was well-connected with many people in this city. She began to resent me when I started working faster, my supervisor had congratulated/acknowledged me for doing getting a lot of work done and newer people to our team often wanted guidance and support at work from me and not her (she was there 20+ years). I always did my best at work to help people, I don’t believe in micro-managing people and I hate being in a position of authority when I wish people could just do their jobs independently but not many people are like that here… my “friend” was an ex-supervisor and she liked to boss/degrade/demean people and act like she owned the place.

         People here always try to knit-pick people’s faults and use them as ways to attack them. My “friend” would always call me moody if I was quiet and didn’t have much to say. Then if I was talkative I would be told I was talking too much (but mind you when I was talkative, I still got the same amount of work done). Another thing I find very unprofessional in workplaces here is how religious people try aggressively to proselytise you as if they have some quota to meet. I find this incredibly unprofessional and disrespectful to all irreligious people or people of other faiths. The ironic thing is that none of these religious people have any Christ-like qualities that would make them respectable leaders/members in any religious community. These people lack work ethics and they are morally bankrupt altogether.

         A few months ago, my ageing parents were complaining they paid $1400 cash for dentures which barely fit their mouths, irritated their gums and they couldn’t eat properly. I was very angry to hear about this, so I told my dad I wanted to write a formal letter of complaint to the dental technician politely giving him an ultimatum to either fix my parents dentures free of charge, give them a refund or I would formally write to the dental council and complain about his poor workmanship and service. This technician wrote back to us and said he will fix their dentures free of charge. When my parents arrived, he was so angry and was yelling at them as if they did something wrong, my mother was afraid of what we had written, luckily my father managed to be a bit diplomatic and he fixed my father’s denture and my mother’s denture had to be fixed twice. It’s a sad part of living in NZ that you have to fight people for your basic rights aggressively in a civil way because they won’t do their jobs properly. My most unpleasant experiences are usually with people who work in customer services. I am always approached by these people and talked down to in a condescending way as if I am stupid and am shamed/guilted because I chose not buy something — thank goodness I have become a pro at online shopping because it has saved me so much money.

         • The mental health system has many agents, like religious people and school teachers, op shop staff, supermarket staff, doctors or anyone in the old boys club. My bet is these ‘friends’ were making reports on you.
           You mentioned an aspergian brother, and you remind me of myself, I have ADHD, or ‘gifted adult’. Google ‘gifted adult’ and see if it fits.
           Do you have Christians at your door fairly often? Thats another way they write reports if you interact with them.
           I pretty much avoid nearly everyone now, due to this level of surveillance against nuerodiverse peoples in NZ. All just for being honest decent human beings!

         • I used to have a lot of Jehovah’s Witnesses coming by my house and my mother (who speaks English poorly) would be too shy to tell them she’s Muslim and not interested. My father would sometimes have a chat with or tell them he’s not interested. I haven’t seen them in over 6 months, the last time my mum felt awkward about it, I told them we aren’t interested and have a nice day. They never came back after that. Despite my family being devout Muslims, I have been irreligious for almost 5 years and I can never go back to Islam. There are too many historical links between the corrupt Roman Catholic Church and Islam that are too difficult to deny. It’s very hard to look at a religion the same way again when you find historical evidence that your very ancient bloodline that has existed in Mesopotamia for over 3000 years (who were Pagan just about 800-1000 years ago) and were basically forced to convert to Islam or die, despite their massive contributions to the advancement of philosophy, science and arts thanks to their strong relations with the Greeks. I’m very fortunate my family still love and accept me despite my inability to believe in any organised religion ever again.

           When my brother first had a breakdown they immediately put him on meds and he’s struggling to get off them. I was caught off guard, unfortunately, and I didn’t intervene in pushing my father not to put him on drugs which I deeply regret. I had a very bad experience with psych meds, I was on them for 6+ years and they ruined my life. I think many people with mental illnesses are gifted. In the ancient world during the era of the mystery religions and Greece, people who had so-called mental illnesses were treated as gifted because they were able to experience multiple realities at once. Unfortunately, in NZ they create mental illnesses in people and foreign children and those from broken homes are usually the main targets so big pharma can profit from these children and hence it creates business and unnecessary jobs in the name of “helping” people with special needs. Most govt institutions that are meant to “help” these people exploit the govt for funding while overworking staff on minimum-wage the managers at the top spend most of the time travelling abroad or going cruising. It’s absolutely disgusting how they exploit the vulnerable people in society.

           I have met many people with ADHD and they are very gifted, it’s a shame they are drugged with Ritalin and Adderal (drug grade speed) which sucks away their creativity, endless reserves of energy, the liveliness of their soul and passion that inspires us. I used to have so many of my peers from single-parent households and foster homes get put on these drugs, I didn’t know how bad it was until I ended up on similar drugs.

           After my brother’s breakdown last year we wanted him to learn to be more independent so we put him in assisted living. My parents took him out of their care after six months because they were corrupting him and trying to turn him against us. Now my brother sees us as his enemies and not a day goes by does he not make life more difficult for us, but neither of us can sleep at night knowing what these people here are capable of doing to him. We are trying to find an outlet for him but it’s very hard as he is keen to interact with the outside world and make friends and most of these people cannot be trusted.

           I don’t have any friends anymore too. I blocked every number from my phone and I only contact one friend abroad and my cousin. I try to always go out wearing sunglasses and I barely talk to anybody when running errands. It breaks my heart inside to know that NZ is a less violent and aggressive version of my authoritarian homeland. My parents were trying to escape from limited opportunities, low salaries, a lying/corrupt govt, and a surveillance state where people get rewards for snooping on relatives, friends, neighbours etc, while those people get tortured, raped and killed. It goes to show what a morally bankrupt society easily duped into selling out family/community values for statism is really capable of achieving collectively with their fake democracy and low IQs.

7. If you never experienced anxiety and depression this is the place to become at one with it.I really had never experienced agesim before coming to N.Z nor did I understand the nature or implications of the term ageism ,it’s a perpetually repeated term in N.Z media .As are horror stories regarding child rape and abuse and child abuse ,the society here is just broken and yet the people here believe they are world leaders in so many areas ,what I have seen as that they adopt philosophies and techniques about 5 years later than California and then claim to have invented them ,it’s just a fucked up place ,every government change has spin doctors and all the idiots change their ideology to match ,sheeple with no history and a very bleak future.

8. Thanks for sharing your story, my mum was from near the middle east and she had a suicide attempt because of kiwis and their shitty ways, as well as my dads poor behavior and alcoholism as he tried to settle in to ‘the kiwi way’.
   I always thought she would have better off moving to a community of her own people in Sydney or Melbourne, and that would be my advice to you.

   Intellectuals have a hard time of NZ, because its so anti intellectual, and runs on dumbing down, unless you’re in the ‘inner circle’ club.

   Many kids of immigrants enter the mental health system in NZ as do Maori, who actually have superb constitutional health as a rule. Kind of says it all about the racism doesnt it?

9. And yet poorly informed migrants keep coming here to New Zealand – Land of bills and no money! I don’t get it. Why do people take no notice when they hear the truth on this site? The issues identified by the articles writer are super common here, including with the lives of NZ born New Zealanders. They tend to shoot the messenger though. Sad. As I have said before, coming here to visit is ok, coming here to live, quite something else. New Zealand is a dark country in all ways!

   • Love this- NZ is the “Land of bills and no money!”. It pretty much sums it up! I would add – and no opportunities.
     Regarding the author’s story – it is painfully familiar and sad.

   • Can you imagine how much hate mail is deleted by admin ? I am so sad to see my family polluted by the N.Z spin Drs but they know nothing else ,this is not an original concept ,just a very lame and unproductive one .

   • Unfortunately, this website was probably not around in the early to mid-90s or at least publicised enough for people to know the drawbacks of coming here which is why I will share this blog with anybody I know who is considering coming here.

   • ….perhaps for ‘bills and no money’ they thought it said ‘land of milk and honey’!

10. Thanks for sharing your story. I’m sorry you had to endure years of hell from this turd infested, con artist, miserable duo island of despair.

11. Sad story but I had it much worse

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